Becoming Self-Aware

March 7, 2013 ~ Issue 39 ~ “Becoming Self-Aware”

Hello Friends,

It’s adorable when a 3-yr-old becomes more self-aware! Jim and I were having a lot of fun playing “hide-and-seek” with our little grandson, Jesse. It’s so cute the way a toddler “hides” by standing in full view of whatever space he finds to hide in, like inside the doorway of another room instead of behind the door, around the corner of a wall, or behind a piece of furniture that is clearly not solid, like a chair with slats in the back. The fun for him is in hearing our voices calling, “Wheeer’s Jesse?” and then as we approach him, his squealing with delight while running right past us. Such fun!

I knew Jesse wasn’t aware of how much he squeals so I filmed him. When we were all settled down after playing several rounds of hide ‘n seek, I pulled him close to me to show him the video on my phone. He laughed with great delight in his voice, “I was screaming!” He was completely surprised to learn that he had been screaming and squealing so much. His “lesson” in self-awareness was so adorable.

Jesse’s sweet play made me think of how young teenagers sometimes become self-aware. Do you remember ever “practicing” your mannerisms and expressions as you explored your identity? Some probably did this more than others, especially those with performance bents, but I’m sure you can identify a bit with the shock of realizing you didn’t always “look” the way you thought you did when making certain expressions or acting a certain way. We can be pretty funny looking at times!

But young children can’t become self-aware on their own; they need a parent’s help. We teach them to lower their voices, practice whispering at times, crying softly, walking instead of running, holding things carefully, setting things down gently, responding with a “Yes Mommy” instead of with a “No!”, learning all the lessons of self-control through all sorts of conduct training. Becoming self-aware doesn’t end with the need to notice our outward conduct. God wants to teach us about our heart-level conduct as well—all of our inner responses to life, situations, and relationships. If we have allowed God to do a cleansing work in our hearts from self-centeredness, we also know how to help our children with their hearts. We provide correction and instruction for their A.I.M. in life—the attitudes, intentions, and motivations of their hearts—about many relational issues that arise on a day-to-day basis all throughout childhood and adolescence.

We’ve all taken a look in the “mirror of our heart” at times, but what we see isn’t always pleasant. We may experience conviction, regret, or guilt, and even want to shove what we see aside and pretend it’s not there. Learning to become more self-aware when you were never trained to self-examine can be a time-consuming process taking months and months to accomplish. But if we help our children take a good look at what’s inside their hearts from a young age, they will not experience the pile up of “dirt” that we did, and they won’t develop the habit of shying away from the truth. They will be able to maintain a clear conscience and understand what actions to take when they feel their conscience becoming cloudy.

If you need to understand more clearly how God wants to work in your heart, my book Empowering the Transfer of Moral Values and Faith will direct you. We’ve also created five mini coaching programs that have been a very practical help to other moms. “Making Heart-Level Connections” will help you take a closer look at the mirror of your own heart, and make the connections with the work God wants to do in you so you can experience the righteousness, peace, and joy of the Kingdom of God and help your children to do the same.

Here is one of God’s wonderful promises of what He wants to do in your heart!

“‘For here’s what I’m going to do: I’m going to take you out of these countries, gather you from all over, and bring you back to your own land. I’ll pour pure water over you and scrub you clean. I’ll give you a new heart, put a new spirit in you. I’ll remove the stone heart from your body and replace it with a heart that’s God-willed, not self-willed. I’ll put my Spirit in you and make it possible for you to do what I tell you and live by my commands. You’ll once again live in the land I gave your ancestors. You’ll be my people! I’ll be your God!” ~ Ezekiel 36:26 The Message

I pray that you will more fully receive the work the Good Lord wants to do in your heart,

Marilyn Howshall for Lifestyle of Learning™ Ministries

[Lifestyle of Learning™/LOLACHE eNewsletter ~ March 7, 2013, Issue 39]