I sat quietly in the chair beside my daughter. I was just there to observe and take notes. Taylor was in the first grade at the time and her reading specialist had welcomed me to sit in on a session. I had come seeking advice on how I could help my daughter learn to read.
You see, my daughter was born with Williams syndrome. This basically means that she is missing a tiny piece of material in each of her chromosomes and as a result she has some physical and cognitive challenges. The specialists commonly refer these types of challenges as a learning delay…or a disability…or special needs. Call them what you will, I readily agreed that my daughter was special!
Her reading teacher began with a flashcard review of sight words, and I was taken by surprise when I realized that she was unaware of what motivated my daughter. She didn’t seem to know that all she needed was a supportive smile and some encouraging words to help her through this challenging exercise.
I was further surprised to see that she didn’t take advantage of my daughter’s natural ability to hear sounds as she presented her phonics curriculum. Was it possible that my daughter’s strength was overlooked because it really didn’t fit in with the curriculum that was being used?
As the session continued, my daughter grew weary and discouraged, but it wasn’t out of resistance to her reading teacher. I began to wonder if a twenty minute chunk of time for reading was too much for her. Or…dare I ask…was it possible that maybe she just wasn’t ready to read yet?
I was a bit disillusioned as I walked out of the classroom that day. I went on to more closely examine the different services that had been recommended by the specialists at her school, questioning whether the methods they used really took my daughter’s unique strengths and weaknesses into consideration. It was also about this time that I began to realize that the goals that had been set for her were not always consistent with or even working towards the accomplishment of my own long term goals for her.
It became more and more apparent that my daughter’s special needs were not being fully addressed at school. While she worked with some wonderful specialists who were indeed the experts in their specific field, I could see that they were not the experts on my particular child. And so the decision was made to go against their advice and to bring her home from school in the middle of her first grade year.
I originally believed that it was only my daughter who had special needs. However I came to realize that my boys had a lot in common with their older sister. Although they didn’t share her syndrome, they were each created with their own unique talents and abilities. They were each programmed from birth with their own peculiar character traits and natural bents, their own struggles and frustrations. They each had their own interests and ways of learning. They also each had their own individual timetable for learning. In fact, the more I got to know my kids, the more obvious it was to me that they all had special individual needs.
As a mom of many children with special individual needs, I have come to believe that it is my God-given responsibility to take complete ownership of every aspect of their education. This includes the types and the amount of activities that they are involved in, the goals that are set for them, and the means by which these goals are achieved.
Thankfully, I am not on my own in this process. I have found the true Expert on my children, the One who created each of them in His own image with the specific purpose of being a unique expression of His personality. He was the one who personally built the special needs into each of them.
It is only in hearing His voice and following His lead that I can have the wisdom to discern each child’s unique needs and the understanding of how to meet each one. Because I have personally come to know the true Expert on my children and their special needs, I am no longer bound by the expectations and standards set by the experts of this world. It is the Lord who knows each of my children individually and loves each one intimately. I am following His agenda from now on.
~ Christi Faagau
Christi you continue to inspire me! I’m comforted being reminded that each of my childen is unique and special and with individual needs that the Lord put in place. He used your post to remind me of my responsibility to cultivate and bring to fruition what He has planted in each one. You and your entire family are such a blessing!
Beautiful post, Christi!
I teach piano to a young lady with Williams Syndrome. She’s been with me for 7 years now! It has been a joy to seek the Lord for ways to help her understand different concepts, and I rejoice as much as her parents do in her accomplishments!
She is now homeschooled, too!
Thank you for your post!
Blessings!
~Trisch
I am a special educator. This is a good reminder to me that rarely can we put kids into a box. We must find their unique giftings and encourage them in that.
Thank You
How creative God is to make such diversity among our children and allow us to love them with His specifications. Thank you for this, Christi!
Thank you so much for this. We are going through a similar struggle right now. I was very dissatisfied with the education my child was getting at school. Since I pulled him out, there has been a huge change in him and especially his behavior. He used to be so frustrated all of the time. I know this is what the Lord wants us to do!
Dear Haley, it must be encouraging for you to see the positive change in your child. 🙂 It is so encouraging for me to remember that the Lord alone knows the unique circumstances in my family and that He also has the perfect plan for us. Blessings to you as you continue to seek Him for your family’s education.